As a parent, you often make difficult choices for the good of your children. You will fight for their good health, for their educational opportunities and to protect them from harm as much as you are able. However, does this mean you should remain in an unhappy marriage for the benefit of the children?
It is a common conclusion of many studies that children thrive when they have the love and attention of both parents. As a result, many parents agonize over the decision of whether to divorce or remain together while the children are young. If you are in this quandary, you may want to carefully examine both sides of the argument.
Staying together
To stay together or to divorce is a question many parents face when their marriages turn sour. While staying together for the sake of the kids may seem the ideal, you will have to ask yourself if it will mean your children will witness arguments, tears and confusing circumstances that may cause them to question your feelings for them. Is it reasonable to imagine you or your spouse becoming so despondent over the unhappy marriage that you are unable to properly care for the children?
On the other hand, you and your spouse may be determined to keep your relationship civil while the children are young. In this way, you may provide a loving, stable childhood for them without letting on that you are unhappy. In fact, if there is a chance that you and your spouse can repair the damage to your marriage, staying together may help with this process.
Living apart
Deciding to divorce means bringing change and perhaps sadness into your family. It is not easy to avoid this reality. However, with careful planning, appropriate honesty and mutual respect, you can guide your children through the process, optimistic that they will adjust to the changes and thrive.
Of course, just as every marriage and family is unique, there can be no cookie-cutter answer. Your situation has its own factors to weigh, and your decision is ultimately you own. If you decide to divorce, the important goal is reaching a parenting arrangement that allows your children to bond equally with both of you. To improve your chances of reaching this goal, it is wise to secure individual representation from an attorney who is committed to keeping your divorce as peaceful as possible.
