If you are a parent who became the victim of parental alienation, you may not know what to do next. How can you stop the impact your former spouse has on your children? If your children already display signs of hostility towards you, it may feel like facing down a losing battle.
According to PsychCentral, parental alienation works when there is manipulation and pressure present. You can counteract it by creating the opposite environment.
Act patiently with your children
Patience is important. Your children may take time to warm up to you again. Do your best to let your children come to you. You can offer empathy and love, but do not bad-talk your former spouse. Your job is to act like an adult and provide unconditional love in the meantime.
Listen to your children’s concerns
Children need to be able to vent. Create a safe space for your children to express their opinions and emotions. You should listen with no judgment, question or emotional reaction. You do not want to interrupt your children or make them feel like they may suffer punishment for their words.
Interact positively with your children
You should have times of structured and unstructured play with your children. Try to participate in the play, but allow your children to take the reigns. When they are in the alienator’s home, they have little control. At your house, you should allow your children to choose the game, play it and how long you will play for.
Try to keep all drama to a minimum around your children. Give them a safe space in your home where they can heal and recover from the alienator’s behavior.